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Sex-Education tips from a Mom who doesn't hold back:
1. Be prepared to be placed into the "Totally Disgusting" category. Yep, that's where I landed since my youngest child finally correlated "having a baby" to actually "having had to have sex". I think I can play this one out to my advantage for a few years. Sex = Disgusting. Perfect.
2. Don't compare "sperm" to "fish". Because after stewing over the conversation for some time, my step-son still can't understand how an actual "fish" could fit into a woman's vagina and swim through her body and stay alive. I think I'm going to try "squirt gun" next time.
3. Forget the line about how you promise not to "laugh" or "make fun of them" for ever coming to you with a question. The whole point of this is to have them trust you, right? Just abandon this at all costs. Because IMMEDIATELY after you promise not to laugh, you're going to be faced with the dumbest sex question E-V-E-R. And you're just going to burst out laughing at them. In their face. Yep, full LOL. And they will never come to you again, so save your energy up for the time when they realize Sex does not = Disgusting anymore.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Sex Education and the Questions That Follow
Posted by Susan at 3:29 PM
Labels: Sex Education and my kids, sperm is more like a squirt gun than fish
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9 comments:
I've been upfront with my son. As for my daughter, I leave that to my wife.
I know this is a serious subject, but that is funny! Good luck with this as I still have a few years. :)
OMG LMAO!! The part about busting out in laughter in your childs face! HAHAHAHA
My friend's kid thought a condom is where you tie it around the balls to prevent pregnancy! She had to excuse herself to call me in fits of laughter!!!!
i just refuse to discuss sex/baby making/baby delivering with our son. he's the type to take the discussion to his 1st grade class and I can't deal with the phone calls.
You keep me sane! So wish you would blog more! Blended with 4 precious kids - crazy NPD ex-wife - u make me feel a little more normal!
Anyway, the sex ? is understood pretty well here, it is the masterbation subject I am totally afraid of!!! =) Hoping that one will never come up!
BTW, crazy ex still tells my 2SD to call their vagina a front butt...what is that about?
thx again for the much needed humor in these situations!
Oh good grief! I'm right there with you! At 8 and 11 there is no end to the questions!
Dear,
After adding a new post on my blog, I plan to do blog walking. After seeing a few blogs, I found your blog. And I find unique in your blog. Very interesting. Keep writing your blog.
Movie Is All Around
That shit about the fish? Hilarious!
Visiting from the Real World site. Or maybe Shelle's personal site. I can't remember.
Glad to see so many cool spam comments as well . . .
;-)
LOL. This gave me a good laugh. I had my 7 year old come to me not too long ago and say, "Mama, I know the sperm comes out of the Daddys penis, but how does it get into the Mummies tummy?"...Ummmm...!
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