Friday, April 10, 2009

Naked People in Gym Locker Rooms. WHY?

Dear Naked Lady At My Gym,


I have simply one question for you.


WHY?


I mean, WHY, IN GOD'S NAME DO YOU STAND THERE F'n NAKED FOREVER, NOT DOING ANYTHING IN THE GYM LOCKER ROOM???? WHY???



I really can't take it anymore.



And the fact that you were STILL there staring at yourself in the bathroom mirrors when I exited the stall to wash my hands and had to BRUSH UP AGAINST YOUR GOD FOR SAKEN NAKED ASS to throw my paper towel away in the garbage can, is just.simply.beyond.me.


F'n.Beyond.Me.


Are you married to the Close-Talker man that hangs naked in the Men's room swinging his sac in front of my husband every so (too) often? Because if that's your husband, you might want to warn him that he's close to being neutered.


Graciously and Always Partly Covered,

18 comments:

ModernMom said...

Ha ha ha. There is always 1!

Jennifer said...

I sort of envy the chronically nude. I wish I had that kind of confidence, although in most cases the people seem to be suffering from some kind of backwards dysmorphia and are blissfully unaware that they would be much improved by a few carefully arranged fig leaves or towels or something.

Sorry you are forced to brush up against that business.

Stacie's Madness said...

sorry, i will dress quicker next time.

Dr Zibbs said...

I don't believe you.

Take a picture and email it to me.

SweetPeaSurry said...

Freaky nasty!!! I have never in my life been completely nekkie in a gym locker, so I can safely say ... that's NOT me!

steenky bee said...

This would have absolutely floored me. I can't even stand the site if someone else's feet if I haven't known them for less than two hours. Gah!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

LOL...that's just gross!

Katie said...

The one and only time I was naked in a lockerroom was to use the "communal" shower - disgusting - but I huddled in the corner wishing I had a fig leaf or something to cover up with. Right as I began to wash the soap off of my face, the 7 year olds' swimming class came parading through on their way back from the pool with their moms in tow. I. Wanted. To. Disappear.

wendy said...

Tee,hee ---I know, what's up with that. I dont' think I'm particularily shy about MY nakedness, but I dont' like it exposed ALL AT ONCE. I like to tease them with first one boob, then the other, and NEVER THE vajay-jay. Eeeks. Cover up.

wendy said...

Tee,hee ---I know, what's up with that. I dont' think I'm particularily shy about MY nakedness, but I dont' like it exposed ALL AT ONCE. I like to tease them with first one boob, then the other, and NEVER THE vajay-jay. Eeeks. Cover up.

Jan @ Struck by Serendipity said...

I don't understand locker room nudes either. ICK.

binks said...

Yikes!!
I think I would've carried that paper towel home and disposed of it. Ick!

Kimberly Zook said...

LOL! Is it a generational thing? Every time I take my toddler to the swimming pool, the only naked ladies in the locker room are 2 or 3 generations ahead of us. I have never seen someone from our generation lingering naked in the locker room. So is this likely to disappear in the next couple of decades? I remember the showers at my middle school and high school; no one used them, but there was rumors of the showers being used 10-20 years before our time!

Swirl Girl said...

I hate spas and gym lockerrooms. I don't do public naked.

Chantelle said...

There is definitely ALWAYS one of these people.

Argh. Put it away people. x

Anonymous said...

Locker room nudity doesn't bother me at all. Although I certainly don't want to be rubbing up against someone's bare ass.

KimberlyZook,

We had to shower in those group showers in junior high and high school, and I graduated high school in 2004. My parents stuck me in all girls schools from grades 7 through 12, and the schools were very strict about showering after P.E.

Sarah

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Austin said...

I couldn't agree more.

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