Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Don't You Hate It When... you're molested at a 5 Star Spa by a 350 LB porn-addict?

OK, Here's my attempt at winning an IPOD shuffle people with a past post (find link to original post below) that I thought was perfect for the theme:


Don't you Hate it When:... you sign up for a full body massage at an exclusive spa only to watch your husband be whisked away by some beautiful foreign love goddess while 7 minutes later you are welcomed by your manly masseuse "Michael" who appears to be 5 feet 3 inches tall, 350+ pounds, with facial hair and glasses who seems way too enthusiastic about this one opportunity to be with a naked woman for 60 minutes alone in a dark room so much that he immediately exposes your entirely naked body for the entire 60 minute session while focusing on your ass cheeks 90% of the time while breathing in COPD excruciating rhythm while repeatedly rubbing his groin area past your weak muscled fingers that you can't move because of the trauma and shock and visions in your head of currently being mishandled by an overgrown computer-porn addict who most likely lives with his mom and 17 cats among cartons of weeks old chinese food cartons? I wish I was joking.

PS...not sure how "PG-13" the original post is...



Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

WOW...that's gross! lol! I hate massages...thanks for confirming that hate for me!!! lol!

Since the contest is almost over for Today...you should enter this in next week!!!

Dave Q. said...

And this is why whenever I get a massage I always ask for a girl. It has been pure luck that I have gotten attractive girls. :)

But anyway, ask for a girl next time. Only way you can guarantee not to get Tubby McWeirdo feeling you up! :)

binks said...

Oh that is too funny and a little creepy. If I am getting a massage, it better be a 6'4" stud muffin or I'm outta there!

Thanks for stopping by today.
I must say, with all your memeberships you will totally have a million readers in no time. I'll have to check back later because I am working, but anyone who has regular F bomb usage must be ok. Sorry I had to leave a book in your comment section, but no email address.

Vodka Mom said...

omg that was TOO damn funny. Yeah, I HATE it when that happens.......

hahaha. (Thanks for stopping. :-) I'll be back, I love to laugh!)