Monday, February 2, 2009

What do Kidney Stones or Cysts have in common with Italian Bread?

Thank God my adorable husband has a doctor's appointment this afternoon to find out some test results he was sent for about a week ago. He was in for just a regular checkup in order to get a heartburn prescription refilled and lord have mercy, pissed in a cup and it tested a little "not so normal". They sent him home with some blood work, and some diagnostic testings of his bladder and kidneys.

Now let me preface, of course I'm hoping all is fine. It is, I'm sure. He's been training quite hard these days and I basically think that's all it is. You would have thought he was diagnosed that day with cancer. I love him to death. But let the drama begin...
Because he was so worried, I called the hospital immediately to schedule the tests needed [and explained to the woman on the other end of the phone how my husband has already picked the shirt he would wear for his first chemotherapy session]. Thankfully, she had a man of her own and got my hint [and by the way, he really DID pick out a shirt for just that purpose - I swear] and put him in immediately the following morning.
So the next day, we went for the test, ran some errands and then went for lunch at one of our favorite Italian restaurants. In the few seconds it took me to rummage through my purse for something, I looked up to my husband's homemade prop of what he actually saw on the ultrasound monitor earlier that morning:


For those of you who might be fooled that this picture simply looks like a piece of Italian Bread with a piece of meatball shoved in its middle, I would like to note that it's ACTUALLY the big black spot on my husband's KIDNEY he witnessed earlier that morning. [Technician defined it as simple cyst, totally normal, very common, no worries.]

In desperation to calm this man down and avoid any future restaurant scenes with food sculpting, I called my Mom who is a nurse. After explaining everything, [and after a couple of man jabs and outright laughter on the other end of the phone] she told me to relay one thing to make him feel better:

"You can live with only one kidney, honey. Does that make you feel any better?"

If you could have seen the look on my adorable husband's face, it was just priceless. That's why we love our men so much. Really.

Love you baby...xo

11 comments:

SBC said...

Hi! Thanks for visiting! I'm laughing my hiney off now. I love men! ;)

Dr Zibbs said...

So that's what it looks like huh?

Stacie said...

awe, they are really wimpy when it comes to medical things aren't they?

I think my hubby is on his death bed about every other day, I have ignored it so much that I fear one day, he just MIGHT really have a cold or something worse.

L said...

Hi, stopping by from SITS. Love your blog design! Very funny and I hope hubby is good. Yes, this is why women deliver the children!

Anonymous said...

Great post honey. I'm dying...well I hope not really??!

Dani said...

When they say "Drama Queen" it does not mean us women!!

Hi Mark!!! Best wishes though!!

Cant Hardly Wait said...

My husband never goes to the doctor for anything. He could have his eye ball laser beamed out of the socket and he'd be all "doctors are for bitches"

MAI HASBAND IZ SMARRRT

Swirl Girl said...

a kidney stone is the closest a man will ever come to feeling what it's like to have a baby - I hope it's only that (if it has to be anything at all)

ps- picked out his shirt for chemo? hahhahahah

TattooedMinivanMom said...

The big strong men are usually the biggest babies when it comes to going to the dr and getting sick.

Glad he's ok though!

I'll never eat italian bread with a meatball stuck in it ever again.

Pearl said...

Sissy-itis is the one thing all men have in common right? Dont even get me started on this... I recently had an emergency appendectomy, but my husband's sniffles somehow took precidence (in his mind that is).

And I love the food sculpting... reminds me of the mashed potatoes scene in close encounters of the third kind...

Katie said...

I'm so glad I was not going to make pasta for dinner tonight. I'm glad everything worked out OK