Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Yes Girls... A woman must have balls too.

This weekend brought an unavoidable teaching lesson to my kids. In the desperate moments of realizing I had no other choice but to act in front of my girls, I simply later called it "The Importance of Standing Up For Yourself".

Or if I kept it plain and simple, I could have simply named it:
"Bitching out an obviously uneducated ass of a stranger who leaves a threatening message about how I was in need of removing personal belongings from my own vehicle as they would be picking up the car for auction disposal."

Oh girls.... Mommy is PISSED right the F_#*K OFF! Please babies, cover those ears.

And on Martin Luther King Day no less, a company holiday, while I'm with my two kids in the middle of my favorite grocery store Wegmans, aisle checkout #15...

This is what I felt like doing:

But then I realized it was not the most appropriate place and time for a total breakdown.

So instead, I chose this mode:

I packed my groceries, pushed the overloaded cart alone out to our van, packed the trunk, packed the girls, emerged into the front seat and then slowly turned to my two "obnoxious at the moment" children and spoke these words ever so s-l-o-w-l-y:

"Girls: Mommy is extremely mad at this very moment. I need to make a phone call, and you are going to hear me yell at someone on the phone. And I may not be speaking very nicely but this is very important so the one thing I need from you is to sit absolutely still right now with nothing but SILENCE. Do you understand? "



[That's my girls...]

And then began my phone call. Poor Maria. Maria the maintenance worker with my fleet company. But this will teach her to read account notes before threatening innocent people right?

Dear Fleet Company and My Own Company's Fleet Executives,

I think you may have mistaken me for someone else. I am not:

If you are in search of those type of employees that lie and steal, treat their spouses to dinner out regularly and fund their personal Christmas parties on their corporate American Express card, guess what? They are still under your care, employed, paid and happy as fucking clams. I'm just that innocent one who's worked her ass off for almost 13 years for you in several different positions, traveling all over this country away from my kids and husband so I could perform for you and get excellent ratings. You know, the one that finished #1 in the country last year? Yes, that's me - the one you threatened with a self-opt sheet because if I DIDN'T sign it you could have forced me to take a position double the travel without any rights to a 13-year severance package.

Fuck You.



Swirl Girl said...

SOmetimes you have to get your knickers in a twist...in this case - you're allowed to bitch someone out.

Doublebanker said...

Just give ya the damn car already!

binks said...


Were the hell did all the people with actual brains go?

Hoping tomorrow is a better day, and your girls learned a lesson in kicking ass & takin' names.

Katie said...

Ass Holes.